Breakup Care Package

Staying Positive After a Breakup

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We’ve all gone through it – that post breakup slump. Where a big black cloud seems to come over your world and all of a sudden you’re encased in negativity and pessimism.

Thoughts of self doubt – “maybe I’m just not good enough for anyone”, fear – “what if I’m alone forever?” and rage – “why can’t he see what he’s missing out on!”, become all too familiar, and our happy-go-lucky selves slowly become grayed out….

These are all very normal thoughts.  All part of the process of working through feelings of pain of the experience.  Eventually we work through them and then gradually, or sometimes suddenly, we realize we’re starting to feel happy again.  We find our normal.

Sometimes when you’re in the slump it seems never ending.  But it does end, it always does.  Nothing lasts forever – not sadness, not happiness.  So, we just wait out the hard times and cherish the good ones.

If you have an awesome best friend they’ve probably already brought you a Break-Up Care Package.  However, there are things that you can do for yourself to help move this process along faster to get you out of your funk.

Here are my top 5 tips to a happy breakup recovery:

1. Get Some Rest

Breakups are emotional and stress out your body.  Your knee-jerk reaction may be to go out and party all night to forget whats-his-face, however all you’re doing is adding more stress on your already tired mind and body.  This is a good time to avoid too much alcohol and instead take care of #1: you.

2. Surround Yourself with Friends/Family

This is probably a time where you’re feeling alone and maybe vulnerable.  It’s easy to get stuck in your own head going over and over all the good times, bad times, the ups and downs and everything between.  It’s easier to get out of your head when there are people around you who care about you and can help you take your mind off things during this time.

3. Treat Yourself

Do things for yourself that make you happy, without guilt.  Go shopping and buy a new shirt, bake the whole roll of cookie dough, watch a whole season of your favorite show, or sit in that bubble bath for an hour with a good book (maybe 101 Reasons Why it’s Great to Be Single?!).  You know what makes you happy, so go ahead and indulge in those guilty pleasures because this is the time when you truly deserve them.

4. Exercise

Yeah, most of you probably hate me right now! Exercise is likely the last thing you want to do when you’re feeling low.  BUT if you get your butt up and go out there and do it, I guarantee you that it won’t be something you regret.  No one says “man I feel so gross after that workout”.  It doesn’t have to be something huge – even going to the gym and hitting the elliptical while rockin’ your favorite tunes is a huge energy booster.

5. Talk About it

Don’t get me wrong – I don’t mean dwell on every little thing about the relationship.  I’m referring to how you feel about it and how the experience impacted you.  It’s definitely much easier to just shut it out and pretend as though it never happened, but all that is doing is pushing that anger, hurt and resentment under the surface and those feelings are going to come up eventually.  It’s easier to talk about them now, so that they can come up and out and you can move on with your life.

Those are just the 5 that I’ve found work best for me.  Have others?  I’d love to hear them – please share in the comments below!

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Single Woman

101 Reasons Why it’s Great to Be single

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Singleness has somehow become a word that carries with it a negative connotation, as if being single means there is something wrong with you. Comments such as “she’s such a lovely girl, I wonder why she hasn’t found a good man yet” are coupled with looks of pity and suggestions of how to meet someone.

Well, I’m here to tell you that the negative connotation of singleness is BS. We learn faster, discover ourselves more deeply, and are overall happier and more content with life when we are single than when we are in an unsuitable relationship with another human being. Over the past decade, I’ve had four long-term relationships; none of which lasted. While I loved them, none of those men were the one. I believe that there is someone out there—that is, a man that will make my heart pound with excitement and my hands clam up— and I will not settle for less than that.

During this time, I have embraced my singleness. I’ve discovered various reasons why, contrary to popular belief, it is truly great to be single. I am not lonely, I am not pining for affection, and I feel more alive than ever. I’m standing up for singleness, and I tell you, it feels great.

101 Reasons Why it’s Great to Be Single is available on AuthorhouseAmazon, and Barnes and Noble 

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Single

Extra Tickets are Yours!

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If any of your friends ever has an extra ticket anywhere – they always invite you, because you are the token single friend!

There are lots of times where this can come in handy – your friend buys tickets for a hockey game and then her boyfriend breaks up with her before she can tell him about it.  Your couple friends split and your girl needs to blow off some steam with a girls night.  Hey, you are happy to take those tickets and give them a shoulder to cry on.  Heck, you may even buy the beer!  Just kidding, being a sexy single lady you should just get the guy in line in front of you to buy them for you 😉

#itsgreattobesingle

101 Reasons Why it’s Great to Be Single is available on Authorhouse and Amazon