Single Woman

101 Reasons Why it’s Great to Be single

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Singleness has somehow become a word that carries with it a negative connotation, as if being single means there is something wrong with you. Comments such as “she’s such a lovely girl, I wonder why she hasn’t found a good man yet” are coupled with looks of pity and suggestions of how to meet someone.

Well, I’m here to tell you that the negative connotation of singleness is BS. We learn faster, discover ourselves more deeply, and are overall happier and more content with life when we are single than when we are in an unsuitable relationship with another human being. Over the past decade, I’ve had four long-term relationships; none of which lasted. While I loved them, none of those men were the one. I believe that there is someone out there—that is, a man that will make my heart pound with excitement and my hands clam up— and I will not settle for less than that.

During this time, I have embraced my singleness. I’ve discovered various reasons why, contrary to popular belief, it is truly great to be single. I am not lonely, I am not pining for affection, and I feel more alive than ever. I’m standing up for singleness, and I tell you, it feels great.

101 Reasons Why it’s Great to Be Single is available on AuthorhouseAmazon, and Barnes and Noble 

#itsgreattobesingle

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Single lady drinks

Happy Hump Day!

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Now that Valentine’s Day is over us singletons can go back to hitting on each other without the awkward topic of “so what are you doing for Valentine’s Day?”

The WORST is when you’ve been on a few dates and then Valentine’s comes along and threatens to throw you into a committed relationship before you really know the person.  It’s a LOVE day, and we just aren’t there yet – oh gawd, palms sweaty.

I’m sure the terms “I’m just gunna do me” was thrown around quite a bit this weekend.  Me?  I spent it with my lady friend getting tipsy and prancing around downtown like idiots commiserating about our lack of love.  Twas a great night.

I always thought it would be great to meet someone on V-day actually, just for the sake of being able to combine two holidays.  Seriously, between his birthday, your anniversary, Vday, Christmas, and other random celebrations that pop up out of nowhere, how am I supposed to keep coming up with amazing blow-you-away surprises (and money!).

But ANYWAYS, it’s over now and we can breathe a little easier for one more year.  Get back on that dating train.  Dating is great – you go out with some random individual you don’t know, and get to learn a little bit about their life.  Even if it doesn’t work out, you get some great conversation (and if you don’t, it’s still a great story to tell your friends).

#itsgreattobesingle

101 Reasons Why it’s Great to Be Single is available on AuthorhouseAmazon, and Barnes and Noble 

Single Valentine's

How to Celebrate Single Valentine’s Day

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Valentine’s Day is most often thought of as a day just for couples.  The day that they are reminded they should appreciate one another… because they just don’t care enough about each other those other 364 days of the year.  In long term relationships, it may also be known as “Oh Right, You’re Here” day.

I like Valentine’s Day simply because I love all holidays.  I enjoy celebrating pretty much anything – why not have an excuse to be excited about something?  However, I think acknowledging Valentine’s Day as a day to be celebrated by couples is all wrong.  Valentine’s Day is a day for singles to celebrate!!

“WHY!?” you ask?? Well…. there are many amazing things to be excited about when you are single for Valentine’s.  Here are my top 3:

  1. No Pressure

That’s right, when you don’t have a boyfriend or a girlfriend there is no pressure about what you are going to do for Valentine’s Day.  “Holy Shit, I have to show this person how much they mean to me today.  My gift and actions are directly related to how I feel about them and therefore I will look like a terrible partner and human being if I mess this up”. Sure, it sounds irrational, but it’s just one of those thoughts.  Those thoughts cause stress and anxiety which I am pretty sure leads to premature death.  So, look at you, you single devil – you’ve just saved yourself some years.

2. Half-Price Chocolate

The day after Valentine’s is my most coveted day of the year… all of that quality chocolate goodness is half price and just waiting for me.  Those of us who are single don’t have to buy that chocolate before Valentine’s Day to give as a gift, we can wait until Sunday when it’s CHEAP.  Saving money is certainly something to celebrate.

3. Pleasure in Commiserating with Your Single Comrades

“Waaaah I’m single on Valentine’s!” “Ahhhh I am too!!” “Let’s drink together and bash all those lame couples in relationships!”  You have to admit, that sounds like a pretty good time.  Especially these days, (when commitment is at an all-time low, and dating apps such as Tinder ruin your faith in humanity and any prospect of hope for a normal future relationship), there are a TON of other single people to hang out with.  You may feel lonely, but you certainly aren’t alone.  Pop open that bottle of wine and drown your sorrows with your fellow single-tons!

Have a wonderful Valentine’s Day my fellow singles!! #itsgreattobesingle

101 Reasons Why it’s Great to Be Single is available on AuthorhouseAmazon, and Barnes and Noble 

Happy Satisfied Staying Single Day!

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Did you know that February 11th is Satisfied Staying Single Day?  Nope, neither did I – until I heard it on the news this morning.  Apparently today is a big deal.

I have to say I love the title.  It isn’t “Fuck Relationships Day”, or “Go to Hell you Canoodlers Day” – it’s just Satisfied Staying Single.  Satisfied.  Just the perfect word.

It really grinds my gears when I hear single people bashing relationships (and I should note that my gears get grinded very rarely). Why? Well, because there is absolutely nothing wrong with two people in love, and the fact that they have found each other does not make you more single than you were before they met.  The only problem there is perspective – the thought that the relationship status of ‘single’ is less than that of being ‘in a relationship’.  This thought is most certainly askew.

There are SO many things that are great about being single. However, the feeling of being alone at times can turn to feelings to loneliness and suddenly we’ve forgotten about all the great things that singleness brings.  That whole “grass is greener” scenario that we seem to say all the time but never really let sink in.

We forget that our grass is pretty freakin’ luscious right where we stand and sometimes we just need a little reminder, like Satisfied Staying Single Day, to kick things back into perspective.

Allow me to offer you some reminders:

  • BONUS INVITES: Your friend/family member is suddenly left solo for an event they bought two tickets to and they need a replacement!  Ta-da, you WIN.
  • GO OUT WITHOUT GUILT: No one to answer to if you want to hit the clubs, or take a weekend vaca with your friends.
  • THE TOILET SEAT IS WHERE YOU LEFT IT: That’s right ladies, no middle of the night bum-dunking for you
  • SAVE MONEY: No spending money this Valentine’s day unless it’s on yourself (and you always know exactly what you want!)

There are actually 101 Reasons Why it’s Great to Be Single.

So go ahead you single saucy devil, get out there and celebrate this Satisfied Staying Single Day #itsgreattobesingle

 

single lady

No Need to Wear Pants

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There’s something about walking around your own apartment with no pants on, which is much more free and liberating than when you live with someone.  Living with my ex, there was never a time where I would come home, take off my pants and shoes, and flop down on the couch to watch TV.  I suppose I could have, I just didn’t.

Living on my own, I may as well have a laundry basket next to the shoe rack.  It signifies that my day is complete, and it’s home time.  Relaxation.  Something in my brain just switches off – “No pants? Oh well then we are clearly not doing anything tonight, time to stop working” – and any stress I had built up from the day just disappears!  It’s really hard to worry about life problems when you’re not wearing pants.  Go ahead, try it.

There are some days where the no pants thing gets in the way – the other day I was very hungover and wanted to order pizza, but answering the door meant putting pants on.  Also, a couple months ago my neighbor upstairs somehow managed to fall off the balcony, and I needed to put on pants to go outside and call the ambulance. Luckily, I usually have a pair of pants laying around near the door so it didn’t take too much effort to slide those puppies back on. #itsgreattobesingle

101 Reasons Why it’s Great to Be Single is available on AuthorhouseAmazon, and Barnes and Noble 

getting over a breakup

How to Get Over a Breakup

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Breakups are the worst.  Either someone has dumped you, or you’re sick of the BS you have to deal with on a daily basis and you’ve made a decision to kick them out of your life.  In any case, you’re left alone, thinking about all the good times you had and all the things you will miss about that person.

There is some sort of sick pleasure in continuing to feel that pain. We have one small thought… and then start to dwell on that thought, and all of a sudden that small pain is an immense torture and we’re sitting in a pool of tears bellowing out “why!?!”, “why?!???”, until eventually our neighbors come to hate us.

Well, that sadness is healthy.  Maybe not to the extreme of surrounding yourself with soggy Kleenex while you yell out to the gods for spiting you, but some sadness is good to sit in for a bit so that you can work through it and not have to deal with it again. Once that sadness is over though, it’s time to move on.  It’s time to visualize a giant STOP sign in your mind each time you think about the “good” times, and maybe even snap an elastic band on your wrist to physically pull yourself out.

Why?  Because it wasn’t good.  It ended for a reason.

Just sit with that for a minute.  For all the great, amazing times you had together.  For all the compliments, and laughs, and heart-melting conversations, there was something (or maybe lots of things), that made it impractical or impossible to continue a relationship.  For all good things, there were equally shitty things just sitting behind the corner not being acknowledged.

So, let’s move on.  You’re an amazing human being with tons of things going for you and there are a million reasons why it’s great to be single.

I’ve started out by outlining 101 of them to steer you on the right path.  This blog discusses a lot of them – they are light, humorous reflections of my own personal experience related to being in a relationship vs. being single.

I thought it would be hard to think of 101.  In fact, they came quite easily.  If you’d like to take a gander check out 101 Reasons Why it’s Great to Be Single.

So go ahead, you amazing individual – visualize that stop sign and start looking forward to all the great things that lay ahead of you. With hope comes all possibility #itsgreattobesingle

Eat greasy food

I Don’t Care What I Eat

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Last night I went to the Sam Smith concert, and it was amazing.  That isn’t the point though, maybe for another day.  The point is that at the concert we had a few drinks and I felt like stopping through the McDonald’s drive through on the way home for chicken nuggets.

When I was in a relationship I would be conscious of my looks and I was always trying to eat healthy for some event we were going to, or some holiday coming up where I had to squeeze into a little dress.

Now that I’m single, I do like to eat healthy, but there is absolutely no guilt in eating whatever I want if I’m craving something greasy.  Hey, there’s a man out there that will love me for me and my nug-handles, right?!  Gotta be at least one!!

You dig into them nugs, you single saucy devil – you deserve it.  #itsgreattobesingle

101 Reasons Why it’s Great to Be Single is available on AuthorhouseAmazon, and Barnes and Noble